25 Jan 5 Ways to empower yourself

Before takeoff, the flight attendant always mentions:
In case of loss of cabin pressure, put the oxygen mask on yourself FIRST, and then help others.

We not only have to take care of ourself, we also get to empower ourselves.
If we don’t do so, nobody might …

These are my favorite 5 ways to empower myself:

1.  THE POWER OF YOUR POSE

Changing your posture for 2 minutes has effects on your hormones.
Really?
Yes, in her TED talk Amy Cuddy explains the effects of a power pose.
Expanding, stretching, and making yourself bigger is called a high-power pose, and causes testosterone level to increase, and cortisol – the stress hormone – to decrease.
And the opposite, hunching over, also called a low-power pose, has the opposite effect …

Isn’t that amazing?
2 minutes of a different posture results in hormonal changes, which change your brain to be more confident and comfortable.

“Configure your brain to cope the best”.
I love how tiny tweaks can have big effects.

2.  TURN DOWN THE VOLUME OF YOUR INNER CRITIC

The thoughts in your head are your internal radio station. To which you listen to all day, every day.
And that ‘broadcast’ is often quite critical.
Telling us, or reminding us, of the things we forgot, should not forget, the things we did not do well, and should have done instead, etc etc.

Would you say these negative things – continuously – to a friend?
I guess you wouldn’t …
But apparently it is okay to be so negative towards yourself.
If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, there’s a chance you shouldn’t say it to yourself either.

In his book ‘Soundtracks’ Jon Acuff discusses he has been looking for a switch.
So he could turn off his (over)thinking completely.
He had been looking for THE switch, could not find it, or when found, learned it did not work (anymore), and kept looking for a different switch.

And then he discovered it’s not a switch. It’s a dial.
So when you hear your inner radio becoming loud again, you can turn the volume down.
I love this!

3.  SLOW DOWN

In the world right now, so many activities are being virtual, sometimes even on different time zones.
Which can be overwhelming.

It certainly has been a challenge for me to learn to say NO.
So many cool opportunities for seminars – that has not existed before – became available. And I wanted to do them. ALL. Which, of course, I couldn’t.
So, I had to slow down.

Take the time to breathe.
When we are stressed, we tend to shorten our breath, breathe high in our chest and tighten our shoulders. This happens without us even realizing …
Take a deep breath, in via your nose. Out via your mouth.
Both feet on the ground.
Relax your shoulders, relax your belly, inhale into your belly, exhale, relax your jaw, relax your tongue. Repeat 😉

Box-breathing is a wonderful and easy tool.
Inhale for 4 counts, hold your breath for 4 counts, exhale for 4 counts, and hold your breath for 4 counts.
You can see why they call it a box. Repeat 10 times.

This is a ‘recipe’ that gets me out of my head, and into my body, if that makes sense.
So I can connect to the here and now, to my gut feeling, to my intuition.

Deep breathing activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which helps you relax.
And the cool thing is that you also have this tool available. At all time! And it’s FREE!!

4.  CHEER YOURSELF ON

If you don’t cheer for yourself, who else will?

In ‘The high 5 habit’, Mel Robbins gives herself a high 5 in the mirror, and silently says to herself “Hey you! I see you! You got this.”
I love the book.
Again, a simple habit. To do first thing in the morning.
It’s backed up with science, which I also love.

By doing the high 5 in the mirror, I realize I often forget to ‘see’ me.
So busy with (taking care and looking out for) others, that I forget myself.

I actually love taking a bit of time, and looking myself in the eyes while doing the high 5.
I love seeing the kindness in my own eyes when I look in the mirror. It’s not always there immediately, but it will come at some point.
I am being gentle, and am learning to be more gentle with myself.

5.  BE KIND TO YOURSELF

Don’t just be good to others. Be good to yourself too.
You deserve that.
Not only for you ’now’, but also your ‘future self’.

Coming back to the soundtrack you are listening to, your inner radio station: listen to an empowering soundtrack.
Be kind to yourself, slow down when necessary and cheer yourself along.
You can even borrow good ‘songs’ from someone else’s playlist, and make your own ultimate playlist!

Wishing you plenty of fantastic songs 🎶 and many high fives 🖐 for 2022,
Much health,
Maaike

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