07 Oct There is no such thing as balance

It was a couple of weeks ago when for the first time I read this somewhere. It confused me. And then someone else said it, and then I heard it – again! You know how these things work; it’s like seeing the same car you just bought driving around everywhere and all the time.
Interesting statement though; there is no such thing as balance. It got me thinking …

Balance to me means that things – all things – need to be in equilibrium. We tend to be busy. All the time. And in order to get everything done we need to divide the time we’ve got. Not just between work and private life; no, we need to divide it between all areas of our life: work, intimate relationship, health, friends, hobbies, family, finance, adventure and spirituality.

Often our mind messes us up. At least, my mind does. The idea that we have to balance everything out, all the time, messes with our mind. Of course, one particular area of our life can be more intense, or more important, or more time-consuming than another such area. One of the most important things in order to feel happy and content is not in the amount of time we put into a certain area – or category, if you will. It’s more about the quality of the time we put into it, or the progress we make
It helps to do whatever you do with full and complete attention; to give it your all. For example, to not think about stuff back home when you’re at work, and vice versa. Be right there where you are: be 100% present!

Let’s get back to the word ‘balance’.
I found it very interesting to translate the word into a feeling. How does balance feel?
For me, balance feels like a gentle and equal pulling at both my arms. My body and my head both trying to keep in the middle of it all. How? By constantly making (small) movements or corrections, which keep my body and especially my mind busy; seeking that much sought-after equilibrium, and a middle ground in all I do.

Besides balance, there’s also centeredness. And for me that feels different – totally different. It feels more grounded. Having two feet on the ground. Steady, and constant. A sort of tranquility, coming from the belly/abdomen. On the one hand more solid, on the other hand more flexible. It feels less hectic. Calmer. More present.

So, how do we achieve balance, or centeredness?
Is trying to achieve balance – or centeredness – something we deliberately do? And do we need to make a plan to do it? Does our mind do that? And if it does, how does that work? How does the mind navigate to finding balance?
It’s important to be aware of and to listen to your body signals; are you feeling energetic, engaged or content? Or is the whole thing wearing you out?
Listen to your own gut feeling! It’ll tell you!
You can put whatever energizes you to use as your compass – your gauge!
And remember: it’s not about the amount of time you put into something, it’s about the fire you put into it!

Say you want to work on a project, and you realize there’s only five minutes left; you can either decide not to work on it at all, or you make those five minutes count! The fact that you made progress towards your goal will make you feel great, and the momentum you have will keep (even if you continue the next day, or week).

One other thing that crossed my path multiple times the last weeks, is Parkinson’s law: work, or any task, expands to fill the time available for its completion.
When you have 4 hours, you need 4 hours. When you have one hour, you need one hour. Isn’t that interesting?
I certainly recognize that – often – I can get more done when I actually ‘don’t have time’.
Does this translate to setting deadlines for yourself? I sure think so.
At least set yourself a time to quit whatever you’re doing. And stop when that time is up. A rest, and some downtime is also very important. Setting a quitting time; I now realize I didn’t do that during the early days of Corona. With the consequence that working from home really threw off my work-life balance.

So, protect and guard your time.
Set your boundaries, and learn to communicate what your boundaries are.
Be(come) aware of what you need, and of what you need to do to keep your energy up.

What does balance mean for you?
How does it feel?
Is it balance that you need?
Or is another word (and with it, another feeling) more suitable for you? 

To you, it may not make any difference at all.
But if it turns out that it does make a difference, isn’t it cool that you are now aware of it, and that you can go tryout how you can use this to your advantage! 

Please share and let me know!
I am really curious and interested in finding out what distinctions you were able to make!

Much health,
Maaike

Thank you Brendon Burchard, Mel Robbins Dean Graziosi, Dave Hollis and Tony Robbins for your inspiration, your amazing books and trainings.

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